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Ruthlessness is absolutely natural.

It's also difficult to be with because of the Societal programing against it.

Know that your prime objective is survival.

Know that you bear no ill will towards external.

Know that if you were forced to make a choice between yourselves or another person surviving the day that you would chose yourselves.  Regardless of whomever that other person may be.  This is less clear cut when it comes to protecting one's children.  Apart from this dilemma it should be obvious over friends, family, government and your fav movie star.

This healthy ruthlessness can be developed over time, the programing against it can be lessened.